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some fun ..
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Author:  garyfritz [ Thu Jan 31, 2013 4:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: some fun ..
I went fishing this morning, but after a short time I ran out of worms. Then I saw a cottonmouth (poisonous snake) with a frog in its mouth. Frogs are good bass bait.

Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in its mouth, I grabbed it right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket.

Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bit. So, I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth. Its eyes rolled back, and it went limp. I released the snake into the lake without incident and carried on fishing, using the frog.

Not long after, I felt a nudge on my foot. It was the snake ... with two more frogs.
Author:  SteveHopwood [ Sat Feb 02, 2013 10:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Welcome to my world of hangups, if you dare to enter
cuzgeorge is one of our most enthusiastic members. He recently sent me pics of his family. Absolutely gorgeous. 'Stunning' does not come close to describing them, I mention this simply to set up a bit of background.

I emailed my response to George. I quote a bit of his reply. Those of you who like a laugh at my expense (and who doesn't?) might enjoy my upcoming discomfiture, as detailed in my response to George's email. Have fun guys; I won't.

:D
I see you’re headed to the 6000 mark soon.

Regards,

George
Hi George

Would you believe this will actually be a mild torture?

At school, I was your inevitable 6/10 guy. OK so < 6/10 was a rare to happen disaster, but 7/10 hardly ever happened. 6/10 every time, however hard I tried. And sometimes I tried very hard. Not always - I was a little boy after all. :lol:

I came to loathe the digit 6, so applied to membership of our forum:
  • 60: hated it.
  • 600: just wanted it to go away.
  • any combo of x600 or xx60 - detest it. Please go away. Don't even like xxx6.
So, the upcoming 6,000? Arrrggghhhh. It will last for bleeding ever. Just make it 7,000, ok?

If we ever get to 59,999 I will tell my friends to wake me up at 70,000, take a significant sleeping tablet and hide under the bed.

We all have our hang-ups. This is one of mine. If I ever manage to invent a time machine, I will travel back and reinvent numbers. They will go 0,1,2,3,4,5,7,8,9,shape, where 'shape' represents the shape that I shall design to represent the missing digit.

Oh crap. I just realised this will not work. I will become the inevitable 7/10 guy. Hey, still a plan though. I can then put off the 'If we ever get to 69,999 I will tell my friends to wake me up at 80,000, take a significant sleeping tablet and hide under the bed.". Puts it off for another 1,000.

Oh bugger. That will not work either, for the same reason the previous would not work.

Hmmmm. Maybe I should use the time machine change my scores to whatever I want them to be?

But then, I would feel guilty because I did not actually earn the scores.

Hmmmm. Maybe I should simply use said time machine to eradicate all knowledge of scores at school. But then how would I know that music was my chosen profession over, say, quantum physics, casino gambling or running a petrol station?

Not so easy this time-changing stuff is it? Better code an EA to deal with it.

Cheers

:D
Author:  cuzgeorge [ Wed Feb 06, 2013 8:49 am ]
Post subject:  Re: some fun ..
Shocking Photos of Poverty in the U.S.A.

How much worse after the Fiscal Cliff?
pic 6.jpg
pic1.jpg
pic2.jpg
pic3.jpg
pic4.jpg
pic5.jpg
Can you imagine just what it will be like after 4 more years
Author:  cuzgeorge [ Wed Feb 06, 2013 8:58 am ]
Post subject:  Re: some fun ..
FISHING SEASON has started
Author:  garyfritz [ Wed Feb 06, 2013 3:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: some fun ..
"What would I [if I ran then-struggling Apple]? I'd shut it down and give the money back to the shareholders."
-- Michael Dell, 1997

"I believe [taking Dell private, giving money back to the shareholders] will open an exciting new chapter for Dell, our customers and team members."
-- Michael Dell, 2013

The irony is just too delicious.
Author:  cuzgeorge [ Fri Feb 08, 2013 7:38 am ]
Post subject:  Re: some fun ..
A man's wife, being the romantic sort, sent him a text............. "If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile.
If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you.

He replied........"I'm taking a shit. What should I do?"
Author:  Durante [ Sun Feb 10, 2013 2:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: some fun ..
1.Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

3. Law of Probability-The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.

5.Supermarket Law- As soon as you get in the smallest line, the cashier will have to call for help.

6. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.



7.Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

8. Law of Close Encounters- The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

9. Law of the Result- When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

10. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

11.. Law of the Theatre & Sports Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.

12. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

13. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

14. Law of Physical Surfaces- The chances of an open-faced jam sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

15. Law of Logical Argument- Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

16. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

17. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.

18. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy -As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

19. Doctors' Law- If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better.. But don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick. This has been proven over and over with taking children to the pediatrician.
Author:  cuzgeorge [ Thu Feb 14, 2013 2:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: some fun ..

Cool! Do you offer broker to broker TT?
Posted in Jem's "Introducing Global Prime Forex Brokerage"

Makes you question matters at/in hand??
COME-ON guys, am i the only one with a warped mind?
cuz
Author:  cuzgeorge [ Mon Feb 18, 2013 10:18 am ]
Post subject:  Re: some fun ..
Keep this in mind the next time you are about to repeat a rumour or spread gossip:


In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom.
One day an acquaintance ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about Diogenes?"
"Wait a moment," Socrates replied, "Before you tell me I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."
'Triple filter?" asked the acquaintance.
"That's right," Socrates continued, "Before you talk to me about Diogenes let's take a moment to filter what you're going to say.. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"
"No," the man said, "Actually I just heard about it."
"All right," said Socrates, "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about Diogenes something good?"
"No, on the contrary..."
"So," Socrates continued, "You want to tell me something about Diogenes that may be bad, even though you're not certain it's true?"
The man shrugged, a little embarrassed. Socrates continued, "You may still pass the test though, because there is a third filter, the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about Diogenes going to be useful to me?"
"No, not really."
"Well," concluded Socrates, "If what you want to tell me is neither True nor Good nor even useful, why tell it to me or anyone at all?"
The man was bewildered and ashamed. This is an example of why Socrates was a great philosopher and held in such high esteem.

It also explains why Socrates never found out that Diogenes was shagging his wife.
Author:  forextrader-radioman [ Thu Feb 21, 2013 3:18 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: some fun ..
Those sweet little kids: Born To Create Drama :)

http://youtu.be/Zh5B4f4bigA
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