Steve's Hour of Need

HannesJoubert · Post by **HannesJoubert** » Thu Jan 22, 2015 5:59 am

Great to hear Steve, I am really glad, thanks for the update...best of luck and blessings moving forward.

H

Post by **wolfeman** » Thu Jan 22, 2015 6:46 am

Righto Stevie! Many of us think about you and Chris....Great to hear of more progress

Post by **SteveHopwood** » Thu Feb 05, 2015 9:55 pm

I just realised that it is a year since my own personal nightmare began - you guys only heard about it early in May but it began a lot sooner.

A year ago today my life descended into Hell. You guys know enough of the details.

A year later: Chris is home and recovering well; her mobility increases day by day; there are plans afoot to modify our downstairs living area so that she has washing facilities that will make a huge difference to her; our life is full of optimism; the cats have discovered that the base of her bed is a lovely place to go to sleep and so are driving her nuts because they insist on sleeping on her feet - she loves the cats but it does not lessen the pain of heavy cats on immovable feet.

Thanks for your care folks. It means a lot to me.

HannesJoubert · Post by **HannesJoubert** » Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:35 am

SteveHopwood » Thu Feb 05, 2015 11:55 pm wrote:I just realised that it is a year since my own personal nightmare began - you guys only heard about it early in May but it began a lot sooner.

A year ago today my life descended into Hell.

our life is full of optimism

Thanks for your care folks. It means a lot to me.

Steve, I am so very happy that you never lost hope and that you can look forward to the future with that same hope, optimism and dare I say it, even with a smile?

It is a blessing to be able to support you, even if it is only via the forum. God is good....

Stay well & stay positive.

H

Post by **thomasmore** » Tue Feb 10, 2015 12:43 pm

SteveHopwood » 05 Feb 2015, 22:55 wrote:I just realised that it is a year since my own personal nightmare began - you guys only heard about it early in May but it began a lot sooner.

A year ago today my life descended into Hell. You guys know enough of the details.

A year later: Chris is home and recovering well; her mobility increases day by day; there are plans afoot to modify our downstairs living area so that she has washing facilities that will make a huge difference to her; our life is full of optimism; the cats have discovered that the base of her bed is a lovely place to go to sleep and so are driving her nuts because they insist on sleeping on her feet - she loves the cats but it does not lessen the pain of heavy cats on immovable feet. :arrrg:

Thanks for your care folks. It means a lot to me.

:xm:

Steve, good to hear that things are improving.
All the best,
Ludo

Post by **SteveHopwood** » Fri May 01, 2015 11:04 pm

I received the pm from Wolfie that I post below. It reminded me that I have not kept you guys up to date with what has been happening.

Before you read down, just let me say how proud I am of this forum's membership reaction to people in life-threatening situations. Twice you guys have stepped forward and put your cash into potentially saving lives.

Chris and I are lucky. We live in a part of the UK where her condition receives fantastic help from our UK NHS service. Others have been so desperate that they have called for help here and you guys have responded. I am proud of what we have achieved here.

From Chris and I, thank you for caring guys. We deeply appreciate it.

wolfeman wrote:Hi Steve,

I was thinking about you and Chris today (it's still Friday morning here) and was hoping that Chris is continuing her recovery.
I suppose you'll receive this message on Saturday when you get up. Anyway, I just wanted to wish the two of you a great weekend

Enjoy,

Andy

Thanks Andy. You have no idea how much I appreciate pm's such as this one. I will post an update that copies what I write here.

I am not sure of exact timings, but I think that this time last year I was emerging from the blackest period in my life ever. I was 62, so nobody can expect to reach that age without the occasional problem.

Nothing had prepared me for what was coming. Chris had lain in the ITU of Doncaster Royal Infirmary with more thingies sticking into her than I had ever believed it was possible for a human body to host.

The medics had decided that she had developed a Fistula. My memories are a tad on the hazy side, but from what I recall, this is a link formed between her bowel and bladder.

It turned out that poo and pee are not supposed to mix, and that mixing them is seriously bad news. The consultant surgeon wanted to operate immediately to close the Fistula, but the anaesthetist was reluctant to go ahead because Chris was too weak to survive the surgery in his opinion - she was in the ITU because she was desperately ill and hanging onto life by a thread.

The consultant gave Chris a 25% chance of survival:

operate now and accept a high risk of death during the op.
put off operating now, and risk near-certain death following a deterioration in her condition resulting in operating under 'last chance' circumstances.
wait for a while and hope she recovered the strength to survive the operation later on.
put off operating now, and hope she will survive. The Fistula will repair itself.

There will be people here who have been in this position; you have my deepest sympathy. The rest of you, just take a few seconds to imagine it is your spouse/parent/child. Then shudder and move on. You really do not want to be there.

Happily, at the time Chris was just about compis mentis enough to understand the options and we both agreed. We chose the fourth option. Actually, I chose it first, and she followed. Nothing will ever release me from the terror of making that decision.

I am not sure how much of all this I have told you guys, so forgive me if this is repetition.

Thing is, Chris survived. Just over a year later she is happily at home and has been for some time.

Nothing changes the fact that Chris is disabled, and badly so, but her life is immeasurably better than it was this time last year. She lives at home. "Carers" come four times a day to move Chris from her bed to an armchair and back again at regular intervals, to alleviate the potential for fatal bed sores to re-appear. She is surrounded by our pussy cats. She looks out over our garden and the ridiculous amount of bird life that lands in it to drive our cats mad.

and loves it. She reads her Kindle and watches TV.

We have the potential for a grant to adapt the lower part of our home to her use. She will soon have the use of a motarised wheelchair to allow her some independent mobility. Not a huge amount, but more than she has right now.

Chris has a few more years of happy life to enjoy. Thank goodness for our UK NHS. She would have died without it.

Take care Andy. Million thanks for your concern.

Cheers

Post by **renexxxx** » Sat May 02, 2015 12:12 am

SteveHopwood » Sat May 02, 2015 9:04 am wrote:Happily, at the time Chris was just about compis mentis enough to understand the options and we both agreed. We chose the fourth option. Actually, I chose it first, and she followed. Nothing will ever release me from the terror of making that decision.

That was a gutsy call, and one that turned out to be a live saver. I can't imagine how hard it must have been for the two of you, to make that decision.

Wishing you both all the best and still many years together.

Cheers...

garyfritz · Post by **garyfritz** » Sun May 03, 2015 6:47 pm

I'm glad things have worked out so well, Steve. Best wishes to you and your lady.

Post by **Dewey McG** » Sun May 03, 2015 7:48 pm

My wife had a fistula and had to have surgery. It took forever to find a competent doctor to do it--the others couldn't even find it! We were lucky though that she was healthy enough to have the surgery and her health is much better.

Our prayers are with you and your wife and we hope she continues to get better.

Post by **SteveHopwood** » Sun May 03, 2015 8:18 pm

Dewey McG » Sun May 03, 2015 7:48 pm wrote:My wife had a fistula and had to have surgery. It took forever to find a competent doctor to do it--the others couldn't even find it! We were lucky though that she was healthy enough to have the surgery and her health is much better.

Our prayers are with you and your wife and we hope she continues to get better.

Those fistula's are real buggers, I am really happy that your wife had a happy outcome.