Thingies that happen to Steve in his other job

[SteveHopwood]

I saw one of the most touching thingies I have ever seen today.

I am often rabid about the lamentable state of our so called, "Education system" here in the UK. It appears to consist of filling kids' heads with endless facts about Maths, English and Science and then testing the buggery out of them to 'prove' that they have learned said facts - ignoring that said facts are forgotten the instant they are no longer in immediate use. About a fortnight later.

Today I saw something better - the first full Sunday rehearsal for the musical, Matilda. This damn thingy is going to dominate my life for the next fortnight. Hey ho. I allow it to dominate willingly and with joy.

Once I heard her sing at audition, I knew the school would find a place for Keira in the musical, Actually, the staff might have found a place even if she could not sing - who would not?

What I expected to find for her is entirely different to what they found for her. I expected to see Kiera seated on a bench out of harms' way.

Instead, I saw her taking a full part, guided by friends who never ever left her without some form of human contact. Truth to tell, I am blubbing now just thinking about it. Her pals are fantastic. The child is having a ball.

Kiera has the very first vocal entry after the show's introduction. She missed it. Hardly surprising as she cannot see physical cues such as the conductor signalling to he to start She got it right the second time after I explained it. Plus, I am spending time with her tomorrow just as I did before the Christmas concert. She will be fully confident and accurate next Sunday.

The rest went swimmingly by the lights of the usual first of the two Sunday rehearsals. The producer is usually bald by the end of it but this time retained a full head of hair. There were some cries of, "Some of you still don't know the words yet. It is blindingly obvious when all you are doing are opening and closing your mouths meaninglessly. Don't imagine even for a second that the audience will not notice," but fewer than in previous years.

You have met Georgi before as part of the senior choir. Her casting as Miss Trunchbull was inspired - absolutely brilliant. She out-acted Masie, who clearly has some lines to learn. She will.

I admit to shedding a few quiet tears during all this. It has been a dreadful couple of years for us all, but more so for the kids. It was wonderful to see them strutting their stuff (and occasionally failing to strut any stuff) and having a great time.

Matilda is a pure 'fun' musical - the reason the producer chose it. She wants kids who have suffered so much to have a ball. She wants the relatives and friends of all the kids to see them having a ball. The first part is succeeding, for sure.

[SteveHopwood]

Kiera came for her practise today.

I have described how far it is from the door to 146 to the piano. "Stay where you are angel, " I called out. I am coming for you."

I went to Kiera, stood behind her and took her shoulders. "Wonderful to see you again darling. I will steer you to where we are going. There are no obstacles in your way. I will not let you bump into anything." Dynamite could not have parted me from her.

Truth to tell, I found her trust awesome.

Try this folks - I just did. Sit on your favourite chair. Close your eyes. Stand up and navigate very carefully to the kitchen. When I opened my eyes at the end of the experiment, I was indeed in the kitchen but a couple of yards away from where I should have been according to my mental map.

It was not a happy experience yet I could have opened my eyes and bailed out at any point on the journey. Imagine the opposite.

Kiera trusted me totally to look after her. Or maybe she trusted her trained killer guide to intervene with lethal force if necessary.

We reached the top of the room and I said, "Swinging right now," so we did. Past the piano and reaching the squiggly chair so I stopped her. I said, "Feel forward with your stick to get your bearings, then with your hand to feel Miss' squiggly chair. When your are confident, then sit in it."

Kiera did all this. I told her to feel around for what surrounded her, then squiggle away to her heart's content. She felt all around her to get her bearings and squiggled away for the rest of our session.

Granted, this was only 10 minutes because she is bright and talented, and all we needed to do was teach her when to make her entry. She learns quickly, does Kiera.

This is one of those, "I wish," thingies. I wish you could all meet this little dab. It was wonderful to watch her on stage yesterday, in those unguarded moments when listening to instructions from the producer. In those she did all the things that young children do; hopping from foot to foot; swinging around; doing little dances - you know the sort of stuff. This little angel is totally confident that nobody around her is going to let her get hurt. Fantastic. Huge kudos also to all of those other kids who look after her on stage.

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Back to the link to the musical at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OtYr7O2cPFM and go 1 hour and 28 seconds in to watch, "Quiet." This damn song is a nightmare to accompany with notes flying all over the place. All our efforts to rehearse have been demolished: Maisie injured her foot badly and was off school for the rest of the week - foot is still in a cast; she should have returned at the start of last week but went down with tonsillitis instead; I could not hear her on Sunday because the microphones were not working and she was stood too far away; we had a rehearsal scheduled for today that she had to miss because of an appointment about her foot.

None of this is Masie's fault. She did not ask to be injured. She did not deliberately contract tonsillitis. That is just life intervening to derail the most careful of plans. It happens.

I am going to school tomorrow for rehearsals with all the principal singers. I am guessing that Masie will turn up even if she has to be wheeled in on a stretcher. If not, that scream you will hear will be me. Good luck surviving if you live within a 50 mile radius of the school - towns and villages will fall.

Wish me luck.

[SteveHopwood]

You will have noted the lack of piercing scream from my direction today. Maisie did indeed turn up, full of life and vigour but still in her foot cast.

I asked if she was in any pain at all. Her reply was, "No. I am stuck with the cast for at least the next six weeks but it is not bothering me at all, apart from being there."

I replied, "Wonderful angel. We like our Masies' to be happy, laughing and making the rest of us laugh, not hobbling around in agony."

I have often written here about how the beam I received in return for something I said to a child would have powered our National Grid for several hours. This was different. The beam Masie bestowed upon me would have blown the National Grid.

We sorted out, "Quiet" with no trouble. Masie did have stuff wrong, always about entries after a brief interlude. With average kids, sorting these out can take a while - bear in mind my love of Masterly British Understatement here. Masie only needed telling once. Joy.

Mind, it was clear last Sunday that Masie does not know her lines. This is not my problem but it arose tangentially this afternoon. I glared at her with mock sternness and declared, "It was blindingly obvious last Sunday that you have a lot of lines to learn."

She giggled sheepishly and replied, "I know. I will learn them."

Of course she will.

I made her the promise I had intended making all through this process. I said, "Poppet, you are a professional actor. Do you do auditions that involve singing?"

"Yes."

"Next time you have one coming up, come to me for help learning the song. Just ask. I will never turn you away." Who could?

The resulting beam would have blown out the galactic National Grid, had it existed. Maybe it does, and squillions of creatures all over the multiverse are swearing whilst waiting for the power to come back on.

We were joined by Sho, playing the part of the cute school mistress, Miss Honey. These two have a duet at the end of one of the song, "When I grow up". Gorgeous.

Then we rehearsed Sho's main song as Miss Honey - This Little Child. In it. Miss H has discovered Matilda's talents and is determined to bring them to the attention of the evil Miss Trunchbull.

Sho announced nervously, "I am quite free with the rhythm here," implying that I might have difficulty keeping up.

Ridiculous idea - it is one of the thingies I do for a living after all - but Sho does not know that. She does know that I am sympathetic towards young people from our senior choir work, so she was nervous not terrified.

"I am quite free with the rhythm here," turned out to be a monumental understatement. I stuck to her like glue - I really am quite good at this stuff. She went away much happier than she arrived.

Then came Georgina playing Miss Trunchbull. Wow. What a star.

Remember how Masie blew us away two years ago? Selecting G to play Miss T was an inspired (inevitable?) piece of casting. She out acts Masie as though M is a pathetic, pointless amateur. I saw that on Sunday in the parts where there was no music but could not hear her perform the songs.

Today I heard G sing her solos. Incredible. Not in terms of vocal quality - she is only 16 after all - but in terms of characterisation. She made me laugh throughout the entire rehearsal. Brilliant. Fantastic.

So, a thoroughly productive and entertaining afternoon.

Again, I wish you could meet these kids.............. Hey ho.

[SteveHopwood]

Masie is one of the sweetest children I have met in a long career - and I have met some belters. She is one of the most talented children I have met in a long career - and I have met some belters.

In every other respect, she is a standard issue teen nutter.

I wanted to make her an offer of help in the future, so she can come to me with help with songs when she auditions for parts that involve singing and where that is part of the audition.

I asked, "I am correct, aren't I, that you are a professional actor?"

Gormless look in response.

I tried, "You get paid sometimes for your acting roles?"

Equally Gormless look in response.

I sighed patiently and added, "You have worked for Netflix."

"Yes," although still looking gormless. Sweet. Usual huge smile. Still gormless.

"They paid you?"

"Yes" etc.

"That is what being a 'professional' means - you get paid for doing something."

There followed a few more seconds of bafflement then the face cleared and there was an,"OH," of understanding. I made the offer. Masie was duly grateful and promised to take up the offer when needed.

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I taught in The Dungeon this afternoon. Jas was last victim but one. Bailey was final victim - both of them escaping their hated French lesson. Bailey announced as Jas was packing up, "We had just started an assessment."

Jas' face fell, then she asked plaintively, "Can I stay until the end of the day, please. Please. Please. You won't know I am here"

Now, I know I should not condone subject avoidance tactics but here is the thingy: we can all remember trying to get out of lessons we hated. For sure I do - especially French.

So I allowed her to stay. Bailey was half way through playing her piece when a flaw in my plan to both keep Jas away from a hated lesson and keep her safe. I teach in The Dungeon with the door open unless the corridor becomes noisy, so there was Jas sat in open view to all and sundry and not where she was supposed to be.

I stopped Bailey and announced that I needed to shut the door. "Why?" asked Jas. I replied, "So that a senior member of management does not pass by and spot you being somewhere you are not supposed to be - then we would both be in trouble."

I closed the door and told Jas, "Now sit behind it so nobody can see you with a casual glance through the window, and remain unobtrusive." She did.

Of course Bailey and I did not ignore her - 20 minutes is too long a time for a 13 year old with nothing to do, to sit in silence.

[SteveHopwood]

Second full Sunday of Matilda rehearsals today. Usual mountainous amounts of junk food consumed by all and sundry,

Evil school head mistress Miss Trunchbull is supposed to be fat and ugly. Many epithets could be applied to the standard teen nutter Georgi playing the part, but fat and ugly are not amongst them. Makeup/costume to the rescue.

Georgi has a massive thingy attached to her torso to make her look fat. Over her goes an ugly khaki dress. Underneath the dress goes a pair of long khaki shorts - no idea why but just speculating that she has to flash them at some point.

It turned out that the shorts were too large for G's slender figure and kept on wanting to fall down, so she kept on having to hitch them up - nothing inappropriate on display I promise, or we would have stopped proceedings. The producer called out at one point about the constant hitching, so G explained and demanded some safety pins to deal with the problem. These were not immediately to hand but promised for tomorrow, so G hammed it up with frequent hitches. Many were the laughs that followed.

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The kids started to make real progress on Thursday, once they got into costume and started to feel their parts. The musical starts with a scene of kids in fancy dress at a fancy dress party. The kids' parents have gone to town over the costumes.

Kiera looks absolutely gorgeous and is having a ball. I don't know if I will ever stop wanting to weep whenever I see her but I will try to keep my emotions in check whenever I have to interact with her.

Julia is not taking part but her bestie Lilly is. Lilly is petite, impossibly pretty, has a smile to die for and clearly loves everyone she comes into contact with - another Masie although with not the same acting ability. Lilly is dressed in the first scene as an Angel, with a halo above her head.

We passed each other. "You are the best Angel I have ever seen, sweetheart." She did a little curtsy and replied cutely, "I know."

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We are well ahead of usual in terms of progress pulling the musical together. It is Sunday and we have another full day of rehearsal ahead tomorrow. We are today where we usually are by the end of Monday. The kids are being spectacular.

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Two more cutsie bits. We had finished and I was starting the car when Masie and Lilly passed in front of me and gave me their usual wonderful, loving wave, which I returned.

I drove around the car park towards the exit. Kids have to cross the path of oncoming vehicles to exit the grounds, so there is a pedestrian crossing to facilitate this safely.

M and L were just starting to use this, so I stopped and waited. I was rewarded with the usual wonderful, loving wave.

I wish you could meet these kids................

[SteveHopwood]

More wondrous stuff today, our full Monday of rehearsals.

There is a scene where Miss Trunchbull is chasing one of the kids, Nigel, for eating her cake. He runs towards his fellow pupils calling for help, so they tell him to hide and they cover him in school blazers so he is hidden. Never mind the details but he eventually emerges from the pile of blazers.

This all happens front of stage in our production. Georgi can only see the floor from well outside of the range dictated by her costume. Blazers were on the floor inside her blind spot, so she fell over them when she stepped forward. No harm done and much hilarity whilst the problem was sorted out - it is what rehearsals are for, after all.

Nigel is actually played by a little girl with long blond hair, who is about as obvious that she is a little girl can possibly be, wearing the sort of short trousers that boys wore to school up to about 1985. The first thingy that anyone needs to do when watching a school production of a musical is: suspend any sense of reality.

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Nothing like the hilarity that ensued when Georgi's microphone disappeared inside her costume. The producer has gone to town with this costume. G has an enormous middle and a huge back end. About the only part of her body that she can access with her hands is her face. I hope she never gets an itch; happily there are excellent physiological reasons why performers on stage never get an itch.

G could do nothing to retrieve the mic. The only way to bring it back was for the producer to reach inside the back of G's costume and fish it out. This took a few minutes.

-----

A couple of cutsie moments from the day that caused beams that may have short circuited some of your power lines:

• Kiera has done brilliantly. I knelt down in front of her and said, "Ehup Kiera. Me again. Can I take your hand, please?" Enthusiastic nod, so I did so and said, "You are doing brilliantly sweetheart. Your entries are spot on and perfect. I am proud of you." Huge beam.
• Four of the group of Motley Musicians that so often infest 146 are taking part in Matilda - Faith, Masie, Martha and Lilly. We had broken for lunch and I saw these four sitting together. There was a packet of Cadburys Buttons that had sat ignored on the end of my piano since yesterday, so I picked it up, walked over and handed it to Lilly. "Here you are folks, split this between you." I wish I could have bottled the four beams that followed and recorded the ultra-cute, "Thank you sir," that followed.

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We have been having a ball these last two days. Tomorrow comes: final dress rehearsal in the morning; performance for the feeder primary schools in the afternoon; first performance for the parents etc in the evening.

Wish us luck.

[SteveHopwood]

The performances came and went without any major hitches. The occasional glitch but nothing serious.

Miss was astonishing. It is probably obvious to all, that instrumental players learn and practise notes until they can play them fluently; ditto singers learning the tune and the words. Perhaps less obvious to the casual eye is that conductors do so as well.

Conductors do not stand in front of an orchestra/choir/ensemble and start waving their arms at random. They also spend umpteen hours figuring out what they want the musicians in front of them to present, and how to achieve it.

Our Musical Director will have done the same. He is head of the maths department but never mind the details; mathematical and musical ability often go together and our MD is brilliant at both.

His fiancée was rushed to hospital on Saturday and was returned on Sunday - happily recovering well. It meant that our MD was absent, so Miss had to step in to fill his shoes.

I have mentioned before that Miss is brilliant but I had not fully grasped how brilliant.

Here is the thingy. The kids on stage were meeting the band for only the third time and needed a lot of help to start singing at the appropriate moments. This is achieved by watching the MD who points at appropriate moments, to the child/children needing to start singing. No problem for a well-prepared MD.

Total nightmare for someone stepping in at the last moment. Miss was fantastic. She was inventing gestures to bring in the singers, "On the hoof" and conveying said gestures to the kids who followed her with the rapt adoration she attracts from all kids.

This was along with keeping the band in order. Not that we needed much keeping - we are talking the likes of Billy, Jeremy and Lois after all - but we did need starting off at the same time.

All this started on Sunday. Come Monday, there was a chance of MD returning on Tuesday but I said that Miss should see out the week. The kids were used to her direction and would only be confused by her being replaced. Everyone agreed. MD did indeed return for Tuesday but was only too happy to step aside.

Brilliant example of the kids coming first.

Miss is still early in her career. She could not have expected to find herself in the position she did last week. Many would have crumbled. For sure, even with all my experience I could not have done what she did. What a star.

---------

The whole thing was emotional. It is two years since the kids were last allowed to do something like this at all, let alone in front of a live audience. Two years is a hell of a long time in a child's life. Many of the cutest group of hoodlums I described two years ago are coming up to their Y11 GCSE exams - including Georgia. They have been robbed of sooooo much.

I am an emotional guy and played much of the performances with tears in my eyes. Good thingy it was dark.

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Some final cutsie moments:

• Gracie: the only member of our senior choir not to take part in the musical. What she did instead was attend all three performances. With 40 minutes to go until the start of the performance and 20 minutes before being allowed into the hall on day 1, I noticed her standing at the barrier between the expected hoard and the rest of us. She explained that all of her 'friendship group' were taking part so she was attending all three performances. I said, "Darling, you are a pupil at this school. You are a member of our senior choir. Come in, bag the best seat in the house and sit down." "Is that allowed?" she asked uncertainly. "I am allowing it. Trust me angel, everybody is busy and will not question you." I repeated the process the following night. Third night, she waited obediently outside with her mum.
• Jas: after the audience were let in to be seated, I noticed Jas with her mum so I went to them. I knelt down in front of Jas and said, "Ehup poppet. Lovely to see you here." It was. I do not think my adoration of this little girl is a secret here. Mum and I introduced each other and I said, "You have a wonderful daughter." Mum replied, "I have heard all about you." "I deny everything," I replied. Jas giggled - a beautiful sound - and it was time to go.
• Lois: We met Lois a couple of years ago when she viciously assaulted the piano piece Fur Elise at every possible opportunity during breaks in rehearsals for Blood Brothers, even though she played the violin during the musical. She was doing so this time. Lois is a gentle soul amongst some powerful personalities and the violin is a soft instrument compared to drums, pianos and guitars. The mixers at the back of the hall would make sure that her contribution would be heard but it occurred to me that Lois would not know this. I called her over to me and said, "Sweetheart, you might be feeling a bit small and insignificant but I promise you that your are neither. Your sound is picked up and amplified by the sound technician and heard all around the hall. You add colour to the sound we are making and you are invaluable." I was not lying. Her beam was on of those National Grid powering beams.
• Luna: for me, the highlight of the entire affair. Our beloved and much missed Mr P has been replaced by Mr G. Mr G is also fantastic and adored by his pupils. His wife and two year old daughter Luna came to the second night. Parents are hanging around waiting for their children to change and emerge to be taken home so it is impossible to get out of the building after the performance, so those of us in the band were hanging around waiting for a path to clear. We became aware of the drums and cymbals being hit. We turned to be greeted by the sight of Luna sat on the drum seat and banging drums and cymbals, and having a whale of a time. Her little body jigged up and down in time to her beat. Astonishing, as well as cute. The following day, dad showed me pics on his phone of him and L doing 'jam' sessions in his music room at home. There is a star in the making here.

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So, our school along with all others, starts to return to something resembling 'normality'. Maybe the dimwits governing our so-called, "Education" system have learned that education is about more the cramming kids' heads with facts about Maths, Science and English and then testing the buggery out of them to prove that said facts have been learned, whilst still releasing at the age of 16 umpteen kids unable to read, write or do basic sums adequately.

Probably not. The next moronic 'educational initiative' run by cretins with no more ability to educate children that I have of writing the code to run a nuclear power station, is probably only just around the corner. After all, why should those of us involved in actually educating our children know what we are talking about?

Hey ho. Those of us involved in actually educating our children will continue to do our best to alleviate the worst excesses of moronic government. Wish us luck.

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And finally, We Did Matilda

[SteveHopwood]

To meet Masie is to love her. There would be something wrong with someone who did not. It is hard to be definitive given the pantheon of wonderful kids I have met in a long career, but I really do think she is the most gorgeous. Kind, gentle, ever smiling with a wonderful sense of humour. Capable of standard-issue 14 year old teen nuttership. What a wonderful mixture.

We have entered our senior choir into a competition in a few weeks time and were working on end of one of the songs they are going to sing. Miss proclaimed that she wants the last note to sound like a sigh, not a cry of, "Thank God. We have reached the end unscathed."

Masie announced, "I sigh when I pee." A couple of seconds passed whilst the rest of us fell about with hilarity then she clapped her hands over her mouth before emitting a rather garbled, "I cannot believe I just said that."

Masie was giggling uncontrollably. The giggles became worse when Gracie asked, "Does that mean when we hear a girl sighing in the loo, it is you?"

Georgie finished her off completely by asking, "Does that mean that you will pee when you sing the final note of the song?"

It was several minutes before Masie recovered her composure. Her tummy hurt and there were so many tears of laughter that I had to offer her a couple of tissues to help mop up the water. This will be a cherished memory for a long time.

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This afternoon was The Dungeon afternoon. I was waiting for Jas. She appeared with a friend, who was on her way to a drumming lesson.

I said, "Ehup Jas. I see you are pretending to have a friend."

"I am her friend," said a highly aggrieved Friend. I snarled, "Ridiculous idea." I gave Jas a (gentle, I promise) shove towards The Dungeon and growled, "Get into The Dungeon, child."

Friend was looking confused and a little apprehensive. Sweet children do tend to think that adults really can do anything they want to kids, so I said to her, "Not to worry poppet. I am only teasing Jas. I adore her really."

Jas gave a theatrical sniff and offered mournfully, "No. He is lying and hates me" and slouched off the The Dungeon. A reassured Friend grinned and trotted off happily.

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You folks will not understand how vital to a musical such as Matilda is the drummer. He/she lifts the whole performance. A really good drummer is an asset to be cherished. A poor one is a disaster. For a couple of years we had a member of staff doing the job; usual thingy - fantastic mathematical brain and equally fantastic musical talent. He was amazing.

Then we had Ruth for a couple of years on her way to study percussion at university. She was amazing.

For Matilda we had 14 year old Eva, taking part in something like this for the first time. The first full Sunday rehearsal is actually much more bloody horrible than I let on. The band is meeting the kids for the first time. Ditto the kids re band. Nobody knows what they are doing. The band is usually in darkness so we cannot see the dots. The kids are not miked up, so the band has little idea of what they are singing.

Into this chaotic mix was thrown Eva, with little if any preparation. The poor love must have staggered out of that rehearsal wondering if the only solution to her problems was to leave town.

What she did instead, with help from her teachers, was work out what was needed from her. She had a full hold on this by the time of the dress rehearsal and was brilliant throughout.

Today was her first drum lesson after the musical, so I went along to interrupt her lesson briefly. I said to Eva, "Darling, you were fantastic in Matilda. You have no idea how much the rest of the band depend on you to drive us forward. You are a star." Then I said to Mr R, "You can be immensely proud of this young lady. She was fantastic and a huge credit to you." That brief interruption in the National Grid supply was Eva's smile blowing some connections.

Mt R came to me later to say how much my saying all this had meant to Eva. Good. She deserved it.

[SteveHopwood]

A part of me feels guilty at the amount of joy this week has brought me.

Thing is, the state of the world tonight is not the fault of the innocent children put in front of me. All I can do for the world in general is the best I can for the innocents within my remit.

We need every bit of joy we can get these days. I shall continue to post the exploits of the standard teen nutters that brighten our lives every day.

This does nothing to stop my heart bleeding for our friends in Ukraine. Dark and sorry days.

[SteveHopwood]

In the spirit of my previous post, here goes.

The kids know that I am giving of my time freely so I can accompany the senior choir and give my pupils the extra lessons they need and deserve.

This does not stop make Julia's bestie, Lilly, feeling jealous when I say to J, "I have a gap this afternoon. Would you like a lesson?" I once heard Lilly say plaintively, "My violin teacher never gives me extra lessons."

I have explained to the kids why other teachers cannot spend the time at school that I do: I am old and do not have other commitments; the other teachers have families to support and mortgages to pay and so have to work full time, unlike me. They understand. Plus, they benefit in other ways; they are in the choir or I accompany their exams etc.

None of this so far has applied to Lilly, who is unutterably gorgeous. She is in the mould of Masie: loving; supportive; wildly enthusiastic; a smile to die for. The clincher for me is that she is Julia's bestie and I adore J.

Lilly and I like each other. Lilly is always to be found in breaktimes, creating piano duets with Julia, or joining in with the general 'jam' sessions that these wonderful kids create, so I decided to offer her a free piano lesson every couple of weeks. She was overjoyed. Her beam was one of those national grid powering thingies.

We had a lesson arranged for after lunch on Thursday. The Motley Group trouped in at their usual time post lunch but a clearly listless Lilly slumped into a chair and laid her head on her arms. She remained in that position until it was time for the kids to go for their first afternoon class. I think she came close to going to sleep. I was worried.

She sat up and I went to her and asked what was the matter. "Tummy ache," was the reply. I told her that we could re-schedule her lesson if she was not up to it. Her reply was a determined, "No. I have stayed because I do not want to miss my lesson."

Awwwwe.

So she had her lesson and we had a great time. We had many a laugh. Lilly is searingly bright as well as talented, so she took in everything I showed her with ease. I said to her, "Julia can help you out if you get stuck as she has already played what you are learning." "I know," she replied, "I have heard her play it." I leaned in close and whispered, "To be honest angel, you have learned it more easily than your bestie." The elicited a delicious giggle.

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I have written about our Advanced Musicians' concert last year. We had a junior version on the same Thursday that I have just described. Stunning thingies happened.

I had five of my piano pupils involved. They are all at roughly the same stage, c. G1 - G2 for those of you who understand the amateur exam system in the UK and elsewhere - many of you will have taken them. They would all be more advanced where it not for Covid but I am helping them catch up.

They had all worked their socks off to learn their pieces, so much so that they could play them from memory. I said to each of them, "You do not need the sheet music, so show off. Play without the sheet music." So they did.

It helped that Miss asked me to play for 15 minutes whilst the audience were settling into their seats, so I did. I am not the soloist I was 30 years ago when I was performing extraordinary stuff, but I still have a repertoire of pieces that I can turn out at the drop of a hat. The kids saw me doing this; it must have encouraged them. In fact, I played like a drain but more of that later.

Imagine you are 12 or 13 years of age and have never performed in public before. You imagine that everyone and her doggie knows when you go wrong. Now imagine you are a member of a child loving audience - many of you will have been there before. Not only do you not know whether the kid performing is 'getting it right' but you don't care. All you care about is that the kid feels successful and comes away feeling happy.

Trust me folks, I have wildly applauded a lot of drivel in my past. Unknowing audiences have cheerfully applauded lots of my drivel in the past. They did on Thursday.

So, Miss and I had spent much of the previous few weeks reassuring children that the audience neither knows nor cares whether they are 'getting it right'.

We won the battle. Not a single child came away from a performance feeling a failure. Each one received a cascade of applause. The night was a roaring success.

There is more to come folks. Enjoy.